Top 10 Gifts to Give Your Favorite SEO

‘Tis the season!  Not everyone celebrates Christmas, but the secular nature of the holiday season lends itself to plenty of non-denominational gift-giving.  If you’re scrambling at the last minute to figure out what to give to your favorite SEO (or the only one you know, or the one who pays you…) here are some ideas for great SEO gifts:

1. A potted plant. As you well know, your favorite SEO doesn’t get out to enjoy fresh air very often.  Bring the outdoors indoors.  That way, when they’re chained to their desk for 12 hours (again) tomorrow, they’ll still be able to enjoy a little bit of nature – and swap from CO2 for O2.
   
2. An elliptical machine. While being chained to their desk may be mentally exhausting, the business of SEO isn’t known for its physical fitness benefits.  To promote healthy habits, an elliptical machine would help the SEO in your life work those muscles that usually help keep the computer chair in place. For bonus points, find one that has a place for a laptop, so they never have to miss an email, a link, or a tweet.
   
3. Clothing without a Web 2.0 logo on it. I’m sure you’re sick of seeing your fave SEO wearing the same 10 t-shirts they came back from the last three SEO conferences with.
   
4. Food & drink gift cards. I’ll make this very simple for you – just make a stop at Starbucks, Dunkin Donuts, and the closest restaurant that delivers.  You know that’s all they subsist on five days a week.
   
5. A homemade meal. See above re: gift cards. Having some Real Food would be a nice change for any SEO.
   
6. Movie tickets and a gift card to a restaurant that doesn’t deliver. I think we’ve already established that your favorite SEO probably doesn’t get out much.  Make them go out and get social.  (Remind them that Twitter doesn’t count for this type of “getting social.”)  You may need to reassure them that you aren’t asking for a link or review in return.
   
7. A massage. Unless you’re all close and personal with your SEO, a gift certificate with a massage is the safest way not to get sued for sexual harassment.  Being hunched over the computer keyboard does a number on their back, and a massage shows you care. In my opinion, the ultimate SEO gift.
   
8. A new chair. For that matter, you can get to the root of the problem and get them a new chair with great lumbar support. Not in your budget?  A nice back cushion would help, or one of those ergonomic chair pads.
   
9. A stress ball. Or a Nerf dart gun. Or a punching bag.  Or a pair of Lightsabers for an office Duel of the Fates.  Anything to help your favorite SEO take out their frustrations when the SERPs are getting them down.
   
10. Alcohol. Nuff said?